Disappearing Birthmark, Old ladies f'bombing it and Baywatch

So, I had a travel breakdown...now many of you might be asking yourselves what exactly is that...well, it's kind of like your car breaking down minus the whole car thing. Almost like a faulty compass or like missing a bus to your next travel destination have you...well, basically it's a term I just made up so bare with me. Well, my breakdown involved a cold, heartless, touristy, lacking any real personality city called Auckland and a girl better known to most of you as Jenny aka me. Something about this city doesn't sit right with me from my initial glimpse of Auckland that first day back in February when I aimlessly wandered the streets completely jet lagged, to that evening spent in Alfred Park at the Chinese lantern festival to this past week where I spent my nights holed up in the kiwi international hostel and my days stuck in the self help section at borders--and yes I did infact travel 1/2 way across the world just to find out if it was in fact true that the self help section is better on the other side of the rainbow--or world have you.
Those who know me would vouch for me when I say I have an unhealthy obsession with this section in a bookstore in fact I would go as far as to say when I was younger I had probably read every chicken soup for the teenage soul known to man including the short lived chicken soup for the divorced, golf loving, bible toting creepy dad series...and yes even these books imparted valuable, inspirational messages to learn from like always make sure your bible cover matches your shoes and belt when taking out some jesus loving honey on a date. so as you see this section had yet to fail me so as I spent this week much in transition I looked to border's self help section for some sort of answer or direction much in the same way people look to mcdonalds for nutritious meals...in other words I knew I probably wasn't going to find what I was looking for but learning about how to be the best possible me, win friends and meet the man of my dreams all in one sitting was too hard to pass up. Anyways all jokes aside it has definitely been a trying week as I try to make sense of my early departure from the valley and what the hell I want to do these next four months....
Sitting in the basement at Borders with elton john's greatest hits streaming through the speakers I palmed my way through a stack of impressive looking books--that were all really thick, had small print and no pictures...with an occasional trashy celeb magazine decorating my pile of reading...and yes I too was appauled to learn that Sarah Jessica Parker was on welfare growing up in Ohio--I mean welfare comeon now...that whole rags to riches story has so been done...need I mention Jewel...campervan...alaska?!?! Anyways as I sat there reading it hit me I can agnoize about how life changes unexpetedly whether your prepared for it or not or I could stop overanalyzing everything and start paying attention to what really matters--like the lovely early 60s couple of chinese women who were dropping f-bombs like nobody's business and egging one another on to see who could belch louder--these were no ordinary burps...I mean seriously we're talking richter scale here folks. That day I learned a valuable lesson besides the critical don't let age and gender fool you women can be just as crude as men, second I learned on one of my visits to the public restroom that new zealand bathrooms are like ridiculously clean...I mean we're talking cleaner than many of the upscale bathroom facilities at such fine dining restaurants as clydes, mortons and the palm...third I learned new zealanders are under the false pretense that 1-ply toilet paper that happens to break into two classifies as 2 ply...which I'm sad to report is definitely not the case...and lastly my great insight into new zealanders is that 15 year old girls getting drunk for the first time sound exactly the same in any country...I mean seriously I get it you loooooovvvve your friend, and yes the room is spinning, oh and double yes you are in fact just that cool spending a tues. night hanging ou in the lady's restroom at the mall, drunk and waiting for daddy to pick you up in the family minivan seeing as your curphew on a school night is 10. anyways my love/hate relationship with auckland is thankfully coming to an end as i finally leave this city behind and learn what its like to use public transportation--the dreaded bus system that is.
My friend Jen from the valley told me that the bus drivers like everyone to introduce themselves and tell something unique about yourself...so this past week I have been toying with 'hi, my name is Jenny and I have a disappearing birthmark." now before you scream lame...let me just let you naysayers in on a little something I like to call conversation starter of the century...I mean seriously how many people can say their birthmark is pink, disappears at the touch of a finger and is shaped like Kirstie Alley pre-Jenny Craig ?? Or there is always the "hi my name is Jenny and I almost killed two chickens in one day--whether it was by accidently locking a chicken into the feed bin where it nearly suffocated to death and developed a serious aversion to food--add giving a chicken anorexia to my list of things to resolve in therapy as well as there was the other chicken or rather rooster that I by accident dumped all the compost on and it nearly got henpecked to death right infront of my eyes. So the vote is on...Jenny the chicken killer or Jenny the proud owner of fashion's latest must have--a disappearing birthmark...you choose!

This past week was also spent visiting Operau or something like that...a beach located in the north that is famous for it's rough waters and surfing. Visiting that beach on a cloudy, windy cold day could not have been any more enjoyable. With the beach nearly deserted except for the occasional surfer or couple walking hand in hand in search of mussels washed ashore--we were free to roam, take in the fresh salty air, dip our toes into the water, collect seashells and reinact our very best baywatch imitations...in other words what more could you ask for? This past week I also visited Devonport, a small island located just a short ferry ride from Auckland which is probably the most elegant and sophisticated suburb I have come into contact yet since being in this country. With antique shops and cafes galore it was easy to spend the whole day wandering the streets, sipping coffee and strolling along the coast. It was also the perfect setting for my last meal with Pippa before we went our separate ways--as we reminisced over the last couple of months, pretended to be all sophisticated in a classy restaurant and shed some tears knowing that not only were we ending one chapter of our journey, but saying goodbye at least momentarily to a friendship that we jokingly related to the movies 'before sunrise and before sunset'...in other words we had a year to meet back up in europe...where we would travel on the millions I would have of course made in just one month after graduating university and then if for some reason that fell through then we would show up to each other's weddings...so either way I have a friend for life.